About me

i'm uncertain. i'm an introvert. i'm a virgo to a T with aries rising and cancer moon (analytical and critical yet nurturing with an inclination towards being impatient and stubborn). i fear myself more than the rest of the world. i'm obsessively liberal. i long to find intelligent people. i stand in my way. i'm a lucky soul. i like dogs more than people. everything can be better. i'm secretly jealous of 'guy things'. i'm never happier than when my hands are dirty.

Interests

Aspiration

,Find a way to live doing what i love and save the world ... just for starters.,

Film

,Run Lola Run,Amelie,Sliding Doors,Godfather I,American Beauty,Empire Records (and,shamefully,anything 007),

Random hobbies/loves

,aromatherapy,horticulture,health and nature stuffs,building and creating,astrology,tarot,good conversation,sewing/quilting,drawing/painting,my dogs,playing in the snow,photography,old things,loving the beauty of nature,

[ view all ]8 COMMENTS

Mar 27, 2008 - 05:51 PM PST

_re

I wish I could say something to help… or make you feel better, but I’ve never been in your situation… my grandparents are divorced, and my grandfather bailed on my grandma and mom when she was little, and she loves him now… sometimes I don’t understand how she can, but she does… it’s that unconditional father-daughter love you talk about. I hope you sort it out for yourself… writing about it is definitely a good way to start!

Mar 22, 2008 - 05:43 AM PST

shallnotfalter

I guess my question is something like "What are you aiming to do with your degree?" If it's in design or photography, there are some really great places in and around my hometown of Madison, Wisconsin that would be glad to take you in. Of course, you'd have to worry about the "Wisconsin accent" (which is actually the Minnesota accent), but it's beautiful, there are tons of parks and pretty places and friendly people, and, for me at least, when being in Cleveland gets to be too much I figure out how soon I can come back to Madison and clear my head.
It's just an idea, though. It sounds like you do need a change of scenery, but if you're afraid, I find the best way is to stay in the same geographical region (midwest)... At least for starters. Hope you're well.

Mar 13, 2008 - 11:04 AM PST

_re

my advice, if you care... write down where you'd like to be (in life) next month, next year, next decade, etc... make a list of everything you want. then, starting with the next month list, write down (literally write these things, it helps) what it will take to get there... and do that for all the lists. and then GO!!! i've been dealing with the same stuff... sending out resumes, looking for apartments, etc, its scary but it has to be done! i had trouble getting started at first but once i did i was on a roll...

i looked through your portfolio, you are clearly talented! good luck taking the first steps! :)

Mar 09, 2008 - 12:23 PM PST

jha

atmyfingertips

So the designer shows her face? (Even she's smiling "zealot style".) So what's doin' in Ohio?

Feb 27, 2008 - 08:23 PM PST

shallnotfalter

atmyfingertips

I absolutely adore that dog.

Feb 11, 2008 - 09:05 AM PST

InFirstSight9

atmyfingertips

I know what you mean. My profession is medical but I will always love to shoot. I don't want to pursue it as a career for the simple fact that I might begin to hate it. It's my downtime :0)

Feb 10, 2008 - 08:14 PM PST

InFirstSight9

atmyfingertips

Your portfolio is really good. You must have patience to do work like that. Do you like it?

Jan 22, 2008 - 08:10 PM PST

jha

atmyfingertips

"grasping at thin air" -- my life on a daily basis.

A new community for artists and creative minds - and a new Internet series from Marshall Herskovitz and Edward Zwick, the creative minds behind "My So-Called Life" and "Blood Diamond."

[ view all ] Latest Writing

a day late and a dollar short

Apr 02, 2008

i'm constantly comparing myself to everyone. it's kind of wierd to, you know, have so little respect for yourself, i guess. lately, since i've been back home, i haven't been surrounded by quality people, exactly. and that paired w/ the ego-booster that i'm dating has made me feel pretty good lately. but it never fails that i get a good dose of reality and come back down to my appropriate level. whether it's hearing about a childhood friend, or my parents' friends' kids or on here or whatever... i'm always so grimly aware of how little i've accomplished. i don't even know how people do it. how do you snag a prime job just out of college? how do you graduate at the top of your class? how do you manage to pay all your bills and survive? how the hell do you never have one hair out of place and wake up every morning with flawless skin?? i don't know how these people do it. everyone always told me i was full of potential, but i've never been able to do much. and actually, i've tried. i don't know. it's just odd, being perpetually disappointed in yourself. kind of makes me wonder how i'll ever make anything of myself, what with being my own worst enemy and all. i've just always had big dreams. i've always wanted so badly to impress people. at times (long ago..) i have, and i miss that. it made me feel good. blah, i feel like such a waste of space these days. oh well. nothing interesting, nothing new.