jackfinn: May 12, 2008 - 12:51 PM PST
Once upon a time, I came very, very close to having the following poem (by Wallace Stevens) tattoed on my left forearm.
A Postcard from the Volcano
Children picking up our bones
Will never know that these were once
As quick as foxes on the hill;
And that in the autumn, when the grapes
Made sharp air sharper by their smell
These had a being, breathing frost;
And least will guess that with our bones
We left much more, left what still is
The look of things, left what we felt
At what we saw. The spring clouds blow
Above the shuttered mansion-house,
Beyond our gate and the windy sky
Cries out a literate despair.
We knew for long the mansion's look
And what we said of it became
A part of what it is ... Children
Still weaving budded aureoles,
Will speak our speech and never know,
Will say of the mansion that it seems
As if he that lived there left behind
A spirit storming in blank walls,
A dirty house in a gutted world,
A tatter of shadows peaked to white,
Smeared with the gold of the opulent sun.
A Postcard from the Volcano
Children picking up our bones
Will never know that these were once
As quick as foxes on the hill;
And that in the autumn, when the grapes
Made sharp air sharper by their smell
These had a being, breathing frost;
And least will guess that with our bones
We left much more, left what still is
The look of things, left what we felt
At what we saw. The spring clouds blow
Above the shuttered mansion-house,
Beyond our gate and the windy sky
Cries out a literate despair.
We knew for long the mansion's look
And what we said of it became
A part of what it is ... Children
Still weaving budded aureoles,
Will speak our speech and never know,
Will say of the mansion that it seems
As if he that lived there left behind
A spirit storming in blank walls,
A dirty house in a gutted world,
A tatter of shadows peaked to white,
Smeared with the gold of the opulent sun.
That poem you posted was sort of weak. There's a lot of way better poetry you could have posted as an example of good poetry. I took that whole first post at face value -- I think what you expressed there was useful and needed to be said. But remember that QL doesn't stand for "Quality Lineup" -- it's just a place where people can express themselves, like you did. Some of what they express will be callow, obviously, but they'll be given the indulgence they deserve. When those people decide they're ready for substantive crit, and begin to seek it, then good -- they've passed the first challenge and they're on their way. They may read this thread and decide it's time to go for it. They may read this thread and find there is a place they can get it. It's all good. 
You should read some Wallace Stevens, now there's a poet to admire and emulate.
