Me, more or less, probly less

Mar 05, 2008

So basically I started this profile a copal days ago and posted a few things I had on my computer already, pictures and little rambling essays and the like. Then when I was looking them over I realized that nothing I have posted thus far are less then a two years old and most are more. Now lets face it 19 and 22 are completely different worlds even if it has only been about 3 years. With that in mind I did sided to just write something about me now, no real plan just some nice rambling. For one if you have see anything else I have written you will notice I hardly ever use that weird semi existential stile I used in high school since then I have been being trained in math and computers by the grate gurus of my collage and I think all the logical thinking has sapped some of the creative righting out of me. Life is certainly not simpler now, if anything it has probably gotten more complicated, but I think I except it a little better, though romance or anything resembling it still seams so much a mystery that I don’t think I will ever have it in my life. I’m lonely, so lonely all the time, I have to surround myself with people, try never to be by myself or not talking or listening, I even stated on this site so that I could just talk and listen to people I don’t even know. I have even stated putting school second and everything else first, I don’t know if I'm going to pass this year or even be able to graduate at all, and then I don’t know what I will do. My enter life I have been rich and a little spoiled, I never had to work, never went without and just always new that somehow after collage things would just magically work out and now that its being taken away I cant even think abut it enough to be scared of it. I know I am better off then most people and every one looks at my life and thinks I'm stupid for not being happy and I may well be, but I remember something I herd somewhere just because other people may have bigger problems don’t make anyone let real. So ya that’s some of my insane rating, expect more.