Bloody Hell

Feb 27, 2008 - 05:29 AM PST
I am almost 18.And i am the most virginal girl you can get in thos wprld.
Not the virginal doe eyed 'what is sex' pretty sheets Sandra Dee type of thing.I know about Sex 101, and even maybe more.but get this, i have never had a boyfriend in my entire life.

high school was a gated community of 300 people.i consider them like family than potential bfs.Of course there are people who dated each other there, but i find it different.i was different.everyone there wanted a specific chick with a label on her forehead.no one wanted weird,freakish, computer geek, rockband listening me.well, it wasnt the rage back then.back then no one knew who my chemical romance was.or even fall out boy.or the strokes.so yeah, i was branded freakozoid.

but its okay, i tell myself.it doesn't matte now.i can always wait until after high school.
its after high school,and i am still waiting like an idiot.a desperate one.its getting scary on why cant i find someone to love who loves me back?heck, i'd even lower the love to LIKE just to see what its like.this is getting terrible.i kept saying to myself, giving mtself reasons and reassurance.i haven;t been meeting people, its still early,blah blah blah.

i guess i am just afraid that one day i'll be like that old lady with the thousand cats.alone,fluffy,senile.bleargh.

i feel like josie in never been kissed.just that im not worse off than her.she was a nutcase.

Bloody Hell

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1 Comments

Feb 27, 2008 - 17:35 PM

daffodilkris on
The cat thing sounds familiar except that I'm not so much a cat fan these days. In the blog you commented on I mentioned a boyfriend - yeah, he lasted all of 9 days, so I'm pretty much in the same boat as you are.