Mar 12, 2008
Im back, Im back, Im back... I dont know whato to do with myself. Well some things I know, but other things I dont. I think after the intial excitement of having made the decision to move and then the making of and carrying out of plans, well thats it, Im here. On one hand I taking things slowly in my mind. I am not fussing and worrying about a lot of the small organisational things I could be. Trying to make the most for once of experience that says that i dont always need to panic and try and get everything done, as soon as possible. At this moment there are not so many things I could be doing, and so am waiting. Am visiting my old/new work and starting things going there, but I dont need to start work until after Easter. Same with the flat... cant move in yet so cant do too much organising for that. Internet etc can wait. (I hope! That I can. Wait.)
Still think its hard to get the balance in being relaxed and going with the flow and then being very active to achieve all you want. I guess it is just a balance everyone must test out for themselves. Must write some day, a little book of things I have found useful and might be useful for others to hear when they are a bit younger. However, I am aware that we only really pick those things up we want to hear and so notice and learn things at different times. However, there are the things that you feel alone in and would be great to know you are not. (ok thats boring its probably the most said thing, or one of them, so wont harp on any more!)
Yes.... its feels weirdddd to be back... hmmmmm not sure.... i guess it will all feel more normal when i get a flat and start work... but i guess in a way i want it also not to feel normal. i want my life here in london to be different in some ways to the life i had before here, as although of course that was also fine in its way... i know i dont want that again as its probably what has stopped me coming back sooner.... 5 and a half years ago it was that i left for Vienna....
Want the excitement and to do things I planned in my head before coming back. No new years resolutions that are kept for one day or if you are lucky a week! Why are we like that!!!!!
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