About a girl.

May 12, 2008

I think that was a movie at one point in time. But whatever. Anyways, I just met this girl. As a friend, she's really nice and she's experienced everything life could throw at you. She lost her mom a few years ago, her sister has been medically-described as not being able to grow out of a 8 or 9-year-old mental maturity, and her dad was the valdictorican at the high school he went to and the college he went to. She's really smart and can keep up with all the complex things I say sometimes. She's also really funny. I'm pretty sure after only a couple weeks of knowing each other that we are pretty close. Like, best friends close. Which is scary for me. I keep thinking about her. Like, in class it can be really quiet and I'll just start busting out laughing becuase I was thinking about something we said the day before. I'm pretty sure she doesn't think about me at least twice in every class like I do. When i get home I check her myspace profile to see if she's on. It's getting a little weird for me. Because I'm not obsessed or anything, but I really don't want to lose her a friend. I've told her more than I've ever told anyone before and she's told me a lot too. But the more I want to be friends with her, the more I'm afraid I'll scare her off. Or one day she'll just suddenly start hating me or something. It's pretty scary to think I could care so much about what one person thinks about me. Like, I've never cared what anyone thinks about me before. It's so weird. Anyway. Her birthday was yesterday so we all went out (us and a few friends and her dad and their moms) to mikatas. We're both vegetarians, plus I hate anything that has ever had the ability to breath underwater, so we both barely got anything. It was so fun though. The guy I like was there too. He is so great and has such a great personality. I've known him for a long time, but there's no way I'm going to go up to him and say "hey, since you just broke up with your snobby; insecure; dork-of-a-girlfriend, will you go out with me sometime?" Do you know how weird that would make me seem? okay. guess not.
But after everyone else left, I was over at this girls house. It was really late but my dad was late to picking me up so we just sat there and talked a little. It was fun becausewe usually only talk over myspace so talking to her in person was pretty fun. I'm obsessing way too much but I'm pretty sure I said something that made her uncomfortable yesterday and I have no idea how to find out or anything. It's really confusing.
anyone have any advice?
message me.
(oh, and I didn't really check the writing or anything so this is probably written really badly and stuff. but I don't have enough time to spend on it.)
Thanks for reading