dan

May 14, 2008 - 22:18 PM PST

when someone you love comes and goes its like getting shot through the heart with no hope of a remedy. my best friend, my brother, my exterior soul leaves to go back to his life on the other side of the country and i feel like part of my body is wrenched from me. its like when he's here i can feel normal, and safe, and comforted. and then he leaves again and i have to patch myself up all alone. i don't want him to go, i want him to stay and spend time like we used to. i want him to feel like this is home, instead of there. i want to fish and drink and contemplate life, and stay that way. from diapers to adulthood, with a friendship eternally unchanging, but separated by miles and days. i'm torn from the inside out, but there's nothing i can do. he's there and i'm here, living parallel lives but just out of reach. i'm broken again. it's so damn hard.