Fustrated with love

Jun 20, 2008 - 18:41 PM PST

I'm quite frustrated right now. I feel stupid. I fell in love with this guy when I was 13 yrs old and I still have feelings for him. Which is weird because I rarely get to see him in person. Either way we reconnected this past summer and he confessed that he had lied to me when he told me he didn't have feelings for me. Which confused me even more because I just don't understand no matter how hard I try if you have strong feelings for someone, wouldn't you fight to be with them? Now he wants nothing to do with me, well at least relationship wise which I'll admit does bother me. What has me more perplexed is the fact that he suddenly became bisexual and now he says hes homosexual, his confusion confuses my already confused mind. Its like my world has this big warping whole of disaster which sucks for me because I was hoping to try and make things work between us now that I was going to be living closer to him for the summer and that we are mature enough to deal with a long distance relationship which would only be temporary until I could transfer to his college.
After his confession to me today about his sexuality I think I need a dramatic change in my life I'm just hoping I find it soon I feel like I'm going insane. Its like thinking of him has consumed my mind