idk me anymore

Feb 24, 2008 - 22:50 PM PST

everybody has an inner view of themselves, right??? what we think of ourselves, what we want, what we feel we need. we have a good idea of who we are and where we stand in life. And until reccently i liked who i thought i was. but the other day i realized i just didnt know anymore. Evertything i thought i wanted from life, all my hopes and all my dreams i realized they werent mine. it has all been influenced by other people. i thought i wanted to go through school, get scholarships, go to college, work for CSI, make good money, retire and then die. thats it, thats all i wanted from "life". but now i realize that i dont want any of that. i dont care about high school or college or a job. i dont want the money or the nice house, because really it isn't worth any of the work. you just end up living a boring life and then you die??? whats the point of that??? i wanna travel, i wanna see the world. i wanna be somebody and do something for this wonderous planet. i dont wanna come home from a rough day at work to sit on the couch and watch the nature channel. i wanna see it in real life. i wanna see all that is out there before i die. i want to actually live!!! Cuz we only get this one life, and if you screw it up, theres no re-do's. life aint no etch-a-sketch, its a doodle that cant be undone.