Insomniac

Mar 29, 2008 - 00:06 AM PST

I think I might be addicted to adding my thoughts to this page. I think I just might be addicted to a lot of seemingly harmless things. It is too late and I should not be missing more sleep. I have been running on hardly any sleep and I can feel it catching up to me so quickly. The bags under my eyes grow heavier and darker and it's getting to the point that nothing will make them any better looking. And for some reason, that doesn't stop me. It does not stop me from thinking - which is really the problem. You see, I hate the feeling of being horizontal nowadays and when I am, the thoughts compound. They multiply and their sizzling background noise gets louder and louder and louder and I can no longer hear them individually. I write and write and the thoughts only grow more intense. There is so much to be done, and so little time. Why are we wasting so much time asleep? Keep moving, keep thinking, keep the eyes open they tell me. I am writhing in spirit, yet my body has no energy left for that.
How is it, then, that I am still moving, still functioning, still writing. I crawl out of bed...just one more time, just this one last thing I have to do. There won't be time later, it's best to do it now.
I can feel it catching up to me so quickly, I can feel my own weakness following me like a shadow. And now its the shadow's turn to play the role of me.