Living vs. Dying vs. Living

Mar 14, 2008 - 01:54 AM PST

In The Things They Carried by Tim O'Brien he discusses one of the soldiers deaths and how you must cope with loss. He mentions that when men die in Vietnam, soldiers who have been there fighting for too long, treat the death as if it's no big deal. They don't care that someone dies because they say that everyone dies eventually and there is no use getting upset over it. Well, O'Brien says death is meant to be unbearable and tragic and it is mean to be cried over. When another man dies you should break down and you should feel sadness and anger and irrational emotion boiling over. He says that the men that don't care anymore are the men that come back from Vietnam dead. The will live the rest of their lives waiting to die and waiting for everyone else around them waiting to die. Instead of taking in every moment they have with the people that surround them. If your not living then you dead. You can see it when you look into their eyes.

I way also just reading a guide to Buddhism called Wide Awake and it mentioned one of the many teaching of Buddhism. The wise men often say to no longer care about death and decay because it is a natural occurrence in life. Everything dies and there is no reason to get upset over death or decay. Basically they're saying to just get over it.

This confuses me. When I read the chapter in The Things They Carried and I knew that, yes, we should get upset over death. However, I then realized that through my belief in Buddhist philosophy I don't which should be my belief on this matter. Since Buddhism is based on the belief to live life to the fullest and become awake and reach nirvana. I don't know which to chose. I hate not knowing enough about either philosophy to develop a reasonable and intelligent compromise. However, I also hate the fact that I don't have enough courage to just chose one, and belief devoutly in one thing. I strive for that confidence. But I can't seem to find it in any of the questions life offers us.