My guiltiest pleasure!

Nov 20, 2007 - 14:37 PM PST

Yeah, for real, Steve! I was surprised to find out one day that I have what I refer to as "has been" syndrome! It's very weird! I was really lucky when I ended up being in a band signed to a major label. Making records and touring with top tier folks! But then, the whole thing was over for me, funnily enough, during my quarterlife moments. Fathom it: From the time I was a small kid, people would ask me what I wanted to be when I grew up and apparently the earliest recorded answer is "famous". As I started channeling my creative impulses into music (and writing, always writing [stories]) at the age of thirteen with my first drum kit, I realized that famous wasn't really the word I wanted to be using. What I did want was to be a successful musician in a major label act, traveling and playing and writing. So then, at the age of thirteen I set myself up for an almost impossible goal for a young Canadian kid living in a town of a few hundred people: I wanted to be in a band, signed to a major label, by the time I was 25. Here's the kicker: I turned 25 during the recording of our first full-length RCA release, while in Chicago. The band had been doing well for a few years already, and we'd released an EP on our own label but had full tour and merch support from BMG/RCA for it. I think I joined the band when I was 22-23. Not bad, huh? Set one goal in life, one impossible goal. And do it. By the time I was 28 it was over. Then, I was left with one terrifying prospect. What DID I want to be when I grew up? I'm still sorting that one out. To wrap it up, finally....lol....my guiltiest pleasure is the fact that I AM NOW OK WITH BEING A HAS BEEN. In fact, for the first time in many years of it being little more than an embarrassment (when you work in a hardware store in my part of the world and people find out you have a past like mine, you realize that THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW YOU LET IT ALL GO...and the funny thing is, neither do you)I now see it as a very freeing experience. I lived my dream, and I survived. I can do what I want now artistically, without justifying it. I grew up, but I didn't grow old. I think I got kind of lucky...and that's cool.