upset

Sep 26, 2008 - 21:03 PM PST

tonight i am upset
i doubt most people will understand
but sometimes it feels like i am so ready to love people and they don't ever want to do so back
i am so ready to like you
to be patient to understand but no one else is
i hate

the world is an unfair place but i see fairness at time ,from people with kind hearts
with you i thought i saw a kind heart , someone of equal proportions of beauty and sensitivty
but i guess i was wrong
i really want to pick you apart make me hate you
hate you for everything
but i can't because i realise human flaws and strengths

some people told me to leave it
to get over it
but i couldn't
i liked you too much
i loved too much again
i hope you never read this
i hope you do
i hope for the sake of it

i wonder what you think about
why you are so quiet
but now it seems worthless
i just want to be a bitch
i want to be bitter and blunt i want to hurt you because you hurt me
like everyone else
like all the other guys who didnt seem to care enough

i think some people see me as confident and solid
i don't think i am half way there

i am so fragile sometimes, its disgusting
in fact for those who may think i am worth it
i am not
this may be the first night i have a hangover, because i am crying
because when i cry my head hurts forever

this may have been the most hurtful night
the night where i actually cried
where i actually tried
where i gave all i could and it didn't happen

love yourself first they say
maybe i will try that again.