what do I do? - ethics

Mar 04, 2008 - 21:51 PM PST

Today was a strange day because it was raining all day. And that seemed to be just what my mom needed to become depressed... not clinically by any means, but it was more than sad in that she was not snapping out of it and it was simply caused by the rain, or at least that was all that I knew. Anyways, I also went with my sister to her fiancee's softball game and she had a problem too. Three years ago she flipped her car while driving at night and she is still not comfortable driving at night. I offered to drive when she mentioned it but she wanted to face her fears or some such thing.

In both situations, I knew exactly what to do as a therapist. I could use reflective listening and try to let them tell me everything that they wanted to say without interrupting or giving opinions or anything. But I'm a daughter and a sister and it's an ethical conflict for me to act as therapist with them. It used to be so easy to just listen to be and act normally before I learned the proper ways to act. But now that I know proper ways, I don't want to screw up and make someone feel bad. Or to have someone blame me for acting in a way that I should not act. I know that I chose the right degree because I am a good listener and I can help my teenage clients and maybe other ages eventually. But is this going to prevent me from functioning as a daughter and as a sister. Can I be a normal human being and a counselor? That question sounds so stupid, but I shut down when they needed me and I feel so bad.

I am definitely going to try to remember to talk to my supervisor about it tomorrow. Learning about ethical conflicts in class is so concrete but in the real world it is heart-breaking. I need to be able to comfort my mother when she is hurting. I need to be open to listen to her when she wants to talk to me. The American Psychological Association can not take that away from me.